Archive | August, 2011

What to Expect Now That Beyonce is Expecting

30 Aug

If there is anything people love more than peeking into the lives of people they don’t know is peeking into the lives of famous people they don’t know. Personally, I think this country is too damn obsessed with celebrity. So much that the lines between reality and fantasy are blurred beyond recognition. To quote Ariel and her latest post on Armoire Chic regarding the public outrage of Will and Jada’s rumored separation, “How did we allow someone else’s happiness determine our own? We don’t even know these people, for goodness sake! Is it that easy to give up on love?” The Smith’s later released a statement saying that they were not headed for divorce court but the damage was done; people were losing their ever loving minds over a couple they had never met.

Enter, Beyonce and Jay-Z.

I’ve long expressed my dismay over the power couple. They are notoriously private but that does not stop them from over-saturating the media. I think Beyonce’s pregnancy marks an all time high (or low, depending on who you ask) for the couple’s PR strategy.  Not only do they both have albums in stores and pending tours in the works, they are now making room for a little prince or princess. In turn, their teams will find new and nauseating ways to subject us to Beyonce and her baby bump.

Oh the joys of opening the market.

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Book Review: Demetria Lucas “A Belle In Brooklyn”

24 Aug

When I think of relationship experts, an older man or women always comes to mind. Some Doctor, with a degree in psychology, giving a seperated couple advice on how to start over and mend their falling apart marriage. I always think to myself, how does this Doctor have all the answers? I invision them taking one man and one women captive, putting them in a lab and performing random studies on them for about 3 months. ( These guinea pigs are getting paid for their time, probably an ad they responded to in the local newspaper.) Studies include: a man approaching a woman, their interaction with one another, sex and how long before the man begins to masturbate. Doctors will probably throw another woman in the mix at the half way point just to spice things up a bit. Of course this is just my mind running wild, but you get my point, right? What actually makes these doctors such experts?

I recently finished reading Demetria Lucas’ book, “A Belle In Brooklyn” and I must say, this book was everything! Belle, (a nickname given to her by her then New York native coworkers, who claim any other city outside of New York City to be country), is no doctor. She doesn’t even claim to have all the answers. What she does is take readers through her dating life: the trials and tribulations of male and female relationships, friendships, and/or situations, one dinner date at a time. “A Belle In Brooklyn” is a refreshing read; so different from the normal boy-meets-girl relationship advice that is just all wrong. When to call? What to say? How long to wait? blah, blah, blah. Belle takes a different approach. She’s not some sly, smooth-talking sales lady looking to get your hopes high. She isn’t trying to sell you a toad who she promises will transform into your prince charming, if and only if you follow her simple advice. No. Belle is an everyday girl living and learning. An adventurousome women enjoying her single life. No set goal on finding a husband or even a boyfriend for that matter. Just basking in the dating atomosphere –  all while taking notes.

Belle’s advice is honorable and sincere. She touches on many subjects and indulges in questions most women may have always inquired but were never brave enough to pursue an answer. Topics that range from men faking orgasms, taking viagra, and personal preferences when it comes to a woman’s physical appearance. The responses aren’t typical or cliché. In fact most are pause-worth but not the, ‘that statement didn’t come out right’ pause, more on the lines of ‘hmmm, very interesting’ kind of pause. Readers are sure to find one chapter, one moment that they can totally relate to. I found many. Although I would love to quote the entire book, I cant.  A chapter that stood out to me was “A Work In Progress” where Belle list 30 lessons she describes as simple and obvious but very hard to get. Here are the five I favored:

You don’t always get closure. Make peace with it anyway.

It’s ok to be alone. You’ll be fine without him. Pinky swear it.

Know that if he is the one, he will be the one.

Men don’t read minds. If you want something, ask for it.

Learn to compromise, but don’t compromise yourself.

It’s probably impossible for anyone not to gather some sort of take-away from this novel. Not only have I learned how to live my best single life, I’ve learned the importance of surrounding myself with successful role models. Whether you’re male or female, single, married, or divorced if you enjoy reading, read this!

-Channie